Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Grandma...


Ann Elizabeth White
October 27, 1925-February 11, 2013

“I believe you did not have a happy life.  I believe you were cheated.  I believe your best friends were loneliness and misery.  I believe your busiest enemies were anger and depression.  I believe joy was a game you could never play without stumbling. I believe comfort, though you craved it, was forever a stranger. I believe music had to be melancholy or not at all. I believe no trinket, no precious metal, shone so bright as your bitterness. I believe you lay down at last in your coffin none the wiser and unassuaged.

Oh, cold and dreamless under the wild, amoral, reckless, peaceful flowers of the hillsides.” 

Even though I never got to spend any time with you, I have learned from what I believe to be true about you.  Through no fault of your own, illness deprived you.  I live differently because of your suffering.  My life is full, I refuse to be cheated.  I see joy and happiness. I am grateful everyday for small joys, small victories and even defeats.  My children and grandchildren will know me...my thoughts, my dreams, my hopes. I will allow all to come in and stay, for as long as they need to. No judgments, no guilt, only allowances and grace.  


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